I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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