he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Randomize
