i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
