Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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