spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize