all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize