i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Alive.
So much puke
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
