i don't plan on having that self control this summer
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
My ass is underappreciated
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
