imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
