dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i barfeds in our rink
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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