I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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