At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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