Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
