One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
