Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
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