It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Randomize
