Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
