just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
