I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
