when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
