i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
