She said her name was "party"
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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