i just google imaged poop.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
