Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
