Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize