seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I am mentally ready for anal.
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