If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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