O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
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the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
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I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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