I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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