we have pet lesbian snakes
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
