dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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