super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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