we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
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Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
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I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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