just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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