He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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