ADVERTISEMENT

• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.

  Fav 22 3843 1864

  share tweet
  

• (954): View more from Florida

  God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.

  Fav 28 1029 4602

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (912): View more from Georgia

  It's not kidnapping if it's romantic

  Fav 17 6804 2129

  share tweet
  

• (773): View more from Illinois

  I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.

  Fav 17 5308 1522

  share tweet
  
• 

  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (501): View more from Arkansas

  She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'

  Fav 12 4886 1709

  share tweet
  

• (702): View more from Nevada

  you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes

  Fav 8 877 2220

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (352): View more from Florida

  One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.

  Fav 8 2875 1033

  share tweet
  

• (706): View more from Georgia

  Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories

  Fav 5 2214 1013

  share tweet
  

• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....

  (1+44): View more from

  The baked potato bra?

  Fav 4 865 1052

  share tweet
  
• 

  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic

  Fav 2 588 455

  share tweet
  

• (949): View more from California

  Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.

  Fav 0 739 558

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (212): View more from New York

  VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY

  Fav 1 950 523

  share tweet
  

• (907): View more from Alaska

  I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard

  Fav 2 793 396

  share tweet
  

• (586): View more from Michigan

  Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.

  Fav 0 263 93

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (949): View more from California

  I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid

  Fav 1 117 115

  share tweet
  

Randomize