Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
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