Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
