He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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