Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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