I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I deserve to be covered in dicks
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize