In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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