school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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