covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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