CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Two words: blizzard sex
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Randomize
