Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize