dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
