glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
