I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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