I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Randomize
