Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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