If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
