I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
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